you would have to be pissed constantly if you had to go home to one of those monsters , no wonder men invented Liquor :-}}
I nearly died in an accident at the Nestle factory today, I was trapped for ages and every time i shouted "The fcukin Milky Bars are on me" everyone just cheered !!
yep about 200 million of them , biggest muslim country in the world . and the lowest foocking IQ as well i think :-}} must have hit their heads to hard on the floor
I confronted my daughter as she strolled in at 3am this morning "You"ve been to a Bukkake party have"nt you"! I said "No I have"nt I promise"! she said contritely "Oh come on" I said "Its all over your face"!
Thatcher dies and goes to heaven. At the pearly gates St Peter asks for her name. "Baroness Thatcher" comes the reply. "Get lost, your not coming in here! You have to go to hell" Lady Thatcher goes downstairs, and three days later Peter gets an irate phonecall from Lucifer. "What the hells going on! Did you send her down here?" "Yes there's no way shes coming into heaven.." "Well shes been here for three days an has already closed down 4 furnaces..!!"
And John McGuinness did look down and say... "You're gonna have to order another one of these chum. I'm a tad peckish today." And he still made Guy Martin look like Stephen Hawking with a puncture!
David Cameron has said that Britain is prepared for nuclear attacks from North Korea.... David we weren't even prepared for fekin' snow in winter.
When Britain was part of an Empire, we were ruled by an Emperor When Britain became a Kingdom, we were ruled by a King. Now Britain is just a Cuntry, and we're ruled by .... David Cameron
coffee all over now...... daughter watched this happen now have to explain Bukkake !!!! intresting try to explain it to a 17 year old
It's a tough call coupe. For years and years, unbeknowst to me, my mother in law was telling all and sundry that I had "taught" her what a blow job was. It was only after I eventually overheard her doing this and impressed upon her the importance of telling people that I had "told" her what a blow job was, that people within her social group stopped shunning me. It's all in the wording...
A grubby old man gets on a train and plonks himself down opposite a beautiful blonde girl in her twenties He eyes her up and down for a few minutes while she tries to ignore him, but eventually he leans over and says "Hey ..... can I smell your fanny?" Shocked, the girl stars at him and says "No you most certainly can not!" He shrugs and looks out the window while muttering "Must be your feet then"
