Now, to start with, I have a huge sympathy for delivery drivers. My dad was a multi drop delivery driver for nearly thirty years so I know just how hard and how thankless a task it is. Plus, the ludicrous feeding frenzy that occurs at the end of December every year just compounds the graft and the abuse that gets stacked upon these guys the whole year around. But... (You knew there was a 'but' coming, didn't you...) An informed delivery date of yesterday slipped into today, and has just slipped into tomorrow for a package I've been waiting for for a week. "FFS!" I hear you all say. "FFS! A mere 48 hour delay and your pram is surrounded by toys! The world is going to hell on a hand cart! One in six children in the UK are officially living below the poverty line and Adele has come out of retirement and you are bitching about live another two days without your soundbar! Have a word with yourself, Ken!" But... That's not quite the point I've flashed up over. The point is that I work in a small office with two other people, both of whom I can see at all times from practically any point in the building. One of us faces the front door that opens straight onto the small carpark we enjoy. We are here from 7:50 in the morning until 5:00 in the afternoon. Apparently, nobody was here yesterday to accept the parcel, so a card was left... Apparently, somebody here today refused the re-delivery... Not seen the van at all, not seen a missed delivery card at all, nobody here admits to refusing it and, in truth nobody has had a chance to lie about that because the other two of us would have noticed. So, my rant is, don't lie to me. If your workload is so great that you can't make it around to me in time, say so. Explain, apologise, face my ire if you catch me in a bad mood, but don't lie. You'll lose my respect, you'll certainly lose my help when a lorry load of lumpy kit has to be delivered in foul weather, but worst of all, you'll cause me to join the ranks of the legions of punters that tar you all with the shiftless, idle, dishonest tag that has always got my back up until now. Actually, getting stuff off your chest doesn't make you feel better after all, does it. I still feel as punchy as Ronnie Pickering at a Dominoes delivery boy convention. So that's more bollocks then.
I do pitty the next delivery driver that makes a stop off at kens shop tho! Although I can see the shops xmas tree getting a new decoration tho!
Craig, I've never worn a thong in my life. (the rest of the drawing is alarmingly lifelike though...)
I can understand your frustration. My wife got a email telling her that the parcel she was waiting on and was about 4 days late had been put through the letterbox. So she emailed them and asked why they were lying. They replied and said "How dare you accuse us of lying" so she replied and said, well on that basis please explain how you got a table and chairs through the letter box? It actually arrived 2 days later. This is not the first time. I had a new set of leathers sent to me for evaluation. Same thing, I was told that they had been delivered which they hadn't despite me being in all day. Again I was told that they (or at least the parcel) had been put through the letter box. Funny how the attitude changed when I called the courier firm and told them what they were supposed to be putting through the letter box, and if they could do that, then they must have had a sharp knife to be able to cut them up, therefore we had a criminal damage, but on the basis that I had not even had shards of leather posted through the letter box, they must have been stoen and so they were complicit in the theft and maybe I should speak to my former colleagues in CID. Funny how their attitude quickly changed from being flipant to being very apologetic. The leathers were delivered eventually.
I had a parcel allegedly delivered. I contacted the company who said it was left inside the porch. I sent them a google street view of my house asking for the parcel and the porch as someone had obviously delivered, installed and removed by the said porch at some time between me leaving the house in the morning and getting home at night! Was quickly refunded for the parcel but never did get the porch [emoji6]
BTW shall we guess at the courier that annoyed Ken? I will go for My Herpes or Yodel. Apparently Yodel is Swiss for "We deliver, just not on time or to the right address"
Know the feeling. Whenever DPD txt us with the delivery time and the drivers name is Ben, we know we stand no chance of getting the parcel. Out of 4 deliveries only 1 actually got delivered. Each time someone was in and no note was left despite no-one supposedly in. They even take a photo as proof they have been and surprise, surprise its not a photo of my address. I complained and the bosses admitted he was useless!!
Luckily for us the DPD route normally has us at the start, and so they often sit outside as their system won't allow them to deliver before the allocated slot. We often invite them in for a cuppa. Could be the reason my DPD deliveries go without a hitch
Thank you all for your sympathetic thoughts... bastard fairweather friends... The villain of the piece this week is Interlink (Dan). I wish it had been DPD (Clive), as he's a pretty good chap and knows us all by name, and always arrives to the minute of the email's estimate. We operate from an odd location, it's true. The converted stable block of a large house, the address of which is on one road, while ours is on the road that runs parallel, so different postcodes for, essentially, the same address. Some say... that our postcode doesn't exist (I point them at google earth, which plonks the pin right on top of my desk), in about a 70/30 split to the 'yay', but we've been here for a year and a half now and take at least three deliveries a day from pretty much every courier there is, so they do know who and where we are. We get a 'failure to deliver' on a monthly basis, always with some ludicrous, made up excuse.
We had the 'photo as proof nobody was at home' once for a £5k printer that didn't turn up at the client's address. Dickheads didn't think that we'd check the header of the jpeg for the date and time it was shot until we sent it back with its EXIF file attached as a text document.
Funny how the attitude changed when I called the courier firm and told them what they were supposed to be putting through the letter box, and if they could do that, then they must have had a sharp knife to be able to cut them up, therefore we had a criminal damage, but on the basis that I had not even had shards of leather posted through the letter box, they must have been stoen and so they were complicit in the theft and maybe I should speak to my former colleagues in CID. So you're not actually TC, more Officer Dibble. ( the younger ones ask your nan)
They are actually my initials, apart from which I was Traffic not a superstar on CID My mother (RIP) always reckoned that I had the initials to go with the job - ACC (Assistant Chief Constable). I was ony 6 ranks short of achieving that position.
Closure...? Email this morning. Driver (Pete) will be delivering your parcel between 12:39 and 13:39. If you care to track your parcel in real time please follow the attached link. So there was the driver's data logger (Pete was currently on delivery 1 of 11. I was number 11), a couple of miles from the depot. Then there was the pin 'Your Location', on a housing estate 2 miles from the address on the box... So it all fell into place. The 'returned to depot undelivered' of Monday, the 'refused delivery' of yesterday. Simply because the driver (Dan/Pete) was reading the directions of the sat nav, but not the label on the parcel. Cue an hour and a half of trying to get Interlink to answer the phone, and finally getting lady who called up google maps, said 'oh dear' several times and finally agreed to call Pete and give him new instructions. Spin on an hour and I'm stood by the window installing a printer and see an interlink van drive past the entrance to the car park and stop in the queue for the traffic lights. For my next impression: Usain Bolt... 'Oh, you're in there are you..' (Pete). Reversing back through the traffic. 'I wondered where you might be'. Then he unloaded my parcel... ...and one for my company. 'But you were coming here anyway.' 'Yes' 'But you were driving past.' Yes, 'cos I didn't know where you were.' 'But the two addresses are the same.' 'Yes' Anyway, I now have a rather strange shaped large box full of AV equipment And an MX5... I wonder if my missus would mind walking home tonight.
