no not a probs mate, prob not done on this forum. just done many times on other ones. As and how's about lisa scott lee?
Whats Black and wrinkled and floats in the bath? No!! not Whitney Houston you sickos....... Trevor McDonald's ballbag.
Bought the wife a fur coat made out of 3600 Hamster skins and took her to Blackpool.. Couldn't get the fucker off the Big Wheel for 2 days!
i was telling a girl in the pub about my uncanny ability to guess what day a woman was born on just by feeling her breasts. "Really?" she said. "go on then....try." After about 30 seconds of fondling she began to lose patience. "come on" she demanded. "what day was i born?". i said "fucking yesterday!"
An old Marine Pilot sat down at a coffee shop, still wearing his old USMC flight suit and leather jacket and ordered a cup of coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the pilot and asked, Are you a real pilot? He replied, 'Well, I've spent my whole life flying planes, first Stearmans, then the early Grummans... flew a Wildcat and Corsair in WWII, and later in the Korean conflict, Banshees and Cougars. I've taught more than 260 people to fly and given rides to hundreds, so I guess I am a pilot, and you, what are you? She said, 'I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about naked women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about naked women. When I shower, I think about naked women. When I watch TV, I think about naked women. It seems everything makes me think of naked women.' The two sat sipping in silence. A little while later, a young man sat down on the other side of the old pilot and asked: "are you a real pilot?" He replied, 'I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian.'
My girlfriend is like a good steak on a BBQ. Once it starts bleeding it's time to flip her over to the brown side.
Too much and for u lot feck me. O you'll live longer if you laugh more and have a good time. trust me the line of work I'm In, you need a sense of humour.
Your wife decides to go out with her friends drinking and dancing.... You’re okay with it, because you get to watch sport and play on the Internet all night... You hear her stumble into bed around 4 and laugh knowing she’s going to have a monster hangover.... You wake up next morning and go outside to the family Volvo, which she used last night.... You sigh in relief because it’s all in one piece.... You circle the car looking for dents and find none... But....
Knock knock....... Knock knock....... Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock.... Hurry up Whitney, I need a shit.
I did hear that if you decide to go to Switzerland to commit supervised suicide , on your last day they serve Cheerio's for breakfast
