Alone at Christmas

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by Remal, Dec 23, 2014.

  1. Remal

    Remal It's ME
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    Just seeing on the news about people being alone at Christmas.

    How can that be? Their own choice?

    By this I mean people who want to be alone, or people who decided they did no want kids so when the get older they have no one to spend the time with?

    I know their are some circumstances where people might be along such as the homeless But even if your in the forces away from family yours not alone

    It seem's most of the news focus on the elderly but surely if they decided not to have kids this would happen in the future. Or that they have friends they can spend time with.

    The line of work I'm in I see many elderly and 99% of them have family that care for them or take the time to make sure they are not alone all the time.
    the 1% I see often have a extended family/friends through care and such on

    I just find the idea of someone having No one to spend some time with at this time of the year unusual.

    or it is the normal Media rubbish they keep spouting out when they have nothing worse to inform everyone about
     
  2. exfire

    exfire Elite Member

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    As usual the media like to make a mountain out of a molehill.

    I work for elderly people and roughly speaking I think 5 % of the ones I work for are spending Xmas alone. Some have chosen to be alone, the main reasons being they can not travel to relatives, and/or they are not mobile enough to navigate stairs/steps at relatives homes or be able to cope with the noise/stress/strain of children. There is one who just hates Xmas and likes to ignore it !

    Only two of my customers appear to actually have no one to spend Xmas with, ie husbands and family all deceased and friends spending Xmas with their relatives.I think the older they get the options become fewer, some of my customers are in their 90's.
     
  3. Remal

    Remal It's ME
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    Are you a carer Exfire? Seems we both work in the same line. I run a care home so don't see people in their homes but more when they are living with us. Why the 1% who have no one I know still have a extended family with us in their new home if you get me.
     
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  4. exfire

    exfire Elite Member

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    No not in the usual sense of being a 'carer' but I work exclusively for elderly people. I provide a 'do anything' service for them. That ranges from gardening, decorating, repairs. maintenance, shopping, escorting to hospital/bank and helping them get estimates for major items such as new heating systems/building work etc so that they do not get ripped off.

    For many of them I have become a friend and confidante, for some, I am the only person they see all week and they can get any assistance pretty much 24 hrs a day from me.

    After getting injured in the Fire Service and getting pensioned out I missed not helping people. So decided to do a little something to keep me occupied and out of mischief !

    Although, as you know, they can get a little 'tricky' I pretty much love them all and hate it when they pass away.
     
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  5. flurbs

    flurbs Active Member

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    I've chosen to be on my own this Christmas, for me, it's just another day. My daughter has now left home, so it is different, as she has lived with me for the past 8 years. Before she moved we still chose the tree from the field, brought it home and put up the decorations together, so that was really nice.

    I will check on my elderly neighbours to make sure that they are ok then I can come home, sit in my pants, whilst eating Pot Noodles and chocolate!!:)
     
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  6. Remal

    Remal It's ME
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    A noble job and not many people who work/help the elderly get the thanks they deserve. in my line it can be very worthwhile often but hard word. \


    But they do say if you work hard you can play hard :)

    And glad to know I have another on here who know's how I can feel sometimes.
     
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  7. exfire

    exfire Elite Member

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    They also get me to do the housework ! I don't mind though, it is important to them to have a clean home.

    I have one couple who are 98 and 97 who have been married for 70 years. She reduced me to a real choking last week when she told me I was the son she should have had.

    Like you say it can be hard work, but then I am cantankerous at 58, so I think they have a right to be a bit difficult when they hit the 80's lol.

    It sounds like you are very committed and above all that you really care, unfortunately there are some people who should never be let near an elderly person IMO.
     
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  8. Remal

    Remal It's ME
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    Oh don't get me started. There are people who should not be let alone with anyone let alone the elderly.

    You must find this job is pretty much a womans world and not easy when your a bloke doing this job

    And why i'm working every day this week but hayho it's the job I choose
     
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  9. Garyb

    Garyb Moderator.
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    MrsB & I was only reminiscing earlier.
    Back in the day She used to support some of the older generation in their own home in our area.

    A few that didn't have the choice other than being alone at Christmas was taken under our wing
    She'd set off and do her rounds while I prepared the Christmas dinner, we'd then run out & deliver three courses & a glass of cheer ;)

    Priceless.
     
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  10. Great Guy

    Great Guy Well-Known Member

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    Sounds like a song by Mud or somebody, a few years ago. I will be lonely this Christmas.........etc
     
  11. DannyBhoy

    DannyBhoy New Member

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    First time on since the festivities and I spent the bulk of xmas on my own, My own choice though.

    I visited my Nieces & Nephews in the morning to give them their pressies and spend a little time with them but my family is so disorganised/disfunctional that any long period of time spent in each others companies usually ends up in a barney for one reason or another so I just gave it a swerve, spent the bulk of the day alone and then grabbed a beer with a mate at night.

    Didnt feel any worse at all for it, Really just another day to me and its all about the little ones who had a great time.
     
  12. Remal

    Remal It's ME
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    Well the main thing was that you did what you wanted mate.
     
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  13. DannyBhoy

    DannyBhoy New Member

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    Similar to the work your guys are doing with the elderly over this period.

    What I did do this year that gave me an immense good feeling was buy xmas dinner for a working poor family through a foodbank here in Aberdeen. Having met this family, my eyes were opened to the fact that they were not scroungers at all but working menial low paying jobs that the cost of living had caught up to leaving them with not much at all to get by after bills etc.

    It all came to under £100 (inc small presents for the children) and it made an incredible difference to this family being able to enjoy the xmas period. It saddens me that we live in a time where these things are neccessary but I was happy to do my bit.
     
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  14. Ramsay

    Ramsay Active Member

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    Like!
     
  15. Si.

    Si. God Like

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    Sounds to me there are some incredibly decent human beings on this forum.


    Top stuff guys.
     
  16. masterblader

    masterblader Active Member

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    Being a pensioner alone at Christmas has become the norm. When I lost the wife years back with no kids found that Christmas was too emotional and depressing with just happy memories to reflect. Thankfully have a gaggle of blade owners who pop in to cheer the old git
     
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  17. exfire

    exfire Elite Member

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    That was a great thing to do DannyBhoy, really nice. restores my faith in human nature when I read something like this.
     
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