HOE HOE HOE HOE - and a bleep of the throttle for cheer ! I dont know about you Lads, I get up early every morning, work all year but it seems when Christmas comes around, i mysteriously encounter a financial fleecing - when i question the other half ... Babe, where did all the zeros go off the end off my bank balance, i find - its due to those ever so lovely outlaws I adopted with the marital bliss contract, you know the contract, the one that gets you to mow the lawn on some of the best riding days of the year - yeah, that contract. Well Ok, thats fine, I like to see everyone happy during the festive season BUT the deal has to be that EVERY family member gets to be happy which INCLUDES the all so faithful loyal & trusty family member with TWO WHEELS - hahahaha (grin). This year my blade gets a nice pair of Lightech Rearsets (about bloody time too - the mother in law has enough fuzzy slippers, ridiculously priced exotic teas and midnight marketed electric toasters to sink the queen mary). So Lads - I hope you follow in good form and as head of your castle it is your duty & responsibility to make sure ALL your family members are attended to this Christmas - so share the cheer and show us what you managed to get away with !
I know exactly where you're coming from BW. Back in the day, I instigated a Christmas day ride out rule, which meant that on the dreaded day in question the bike and I had a bit of 'us' time, with the minimum amount of traffic, pedestrians or the Feds interfering in our progress. That was the excuse anyway. The reality was that the other tradition created after my marriage was Christmas morning spent with my wife's family and evil offspring, usually wasted putting together toys and kit they couldn't be arsed to do for themselves and having to do it sober because in wouldn't be 'fair' if my beloved wife could not enjoy a drink with her family on Christmas day. This cleverly segued into the latter part of the day, when we needed to visit my nearest and dearest as 'you'd better drive this evening hon', as I've had a few to drink'. So, a ride out on Christmas morning meant that A: I didn't have to attend the coven assembling, 2: Jeanette got to drive herself to it which kept open an option for me to get bladdered later on, and thirdly, it was accepted by all as 'Ken's little tradition' so nobody bitched about my not being present. When I hung up my riding boots for a couple of decades I needed to, at least, regain some control over even just one day of the year. Forget birthdays, they are usually spent at the beck and call of others, hanging around waiting for them to turn up to hand over a present you don't want. So, I created 'Uncle Ken day'. On Uncle Ken day, uncle Ken gets to do whatever uncle Ken wants to do and say whatever he wants, to whoever he wants. He will brook no question, query or censure on his decisions or choices made on this day and no repercussions from any of the above will be subsequently entertained after the event. Uncle Ken day does not have to be on the same day every year and can be declared to be occurring with only the minimum of advanced warning, with due consideration, before the day. Over the years, it has done me well. It is accepted as not too much to ask from the only member of the social circle who can set up a new printer, or bypass the need to read the instruction manual of a new camera. So much so that anyone who now tries to break the covenant by word or deed is shouted down by the rest of the group lest the full intensity of next year's uncle Ken day's disdain is focussed on them. I recommend it to you all. It's my Christmas gift to you.
hahahha ABSOLUTELY PRICELESS and to be sure, pearls of wisdom indeed - a worthy tradition to keep going - and im volunteering to be the first from down under to keep it going for you mate - haha i can hardly wait to try it, i particularly like the "without warning" touch !
