OK, This is weird!

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by vino, Mar 20, 2012.

  1. vino

    vino New Member

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    OK, so those of you that know me, probably know that I travel a fair bit for work...usually without interest or incident.

    So, I'm on my 1st visit to Ukraine. My distributor here kindly arranged a taxi from the airport for me...I came through arrivals to find a guy that looked like Benny from Crossroads, with a piece of A4 with my name on safety pinned to his chest..he led me to a late 80's Vauxhall Cavalier (with no seat belts or sunshine roof), and drove me to my hotel in central Kiev at glacial pace. I could have pushed faster.

    Check in to the hotel, go to room. Call room service and order a pot pot of coffee. "You want pot of coffee?" "Yes please" "seriously, a pot?" "Yes, please" "but pot has 4 cups in" "Yes please" "OK"...10 mins later there's a knock at the door.."You really want pot of coffee, not cup?" "Yeah" "You sure" "Yeah" "But it has 4 cups in" "I know, I like coffee" "OK". 10 mins later, pot of coffee arrives - max points for double checking.

    Go outside for a cigarette. I'm approached by a women with a moving bulge in her jacket, and asked for a cigarette. I oblige. She then opens her jacket and offers me a puppy she's just found wondering in the street. I respectfully decline her kind offer.

    I go out to dinner with the MD from our distributor.

    Get back to the hotel and decide on a couple of cheeky pints before bed and order some crisps as well. 5 mins later I'm served a basket of crisps by a bang tidy bird in an extremely skimpy French maids outfit that doesn't leave much to the imagination. She departs, I ask the barman what that's was all about, and in the most matter of fact way he informs me that she's a dancer from the strip bar on the 2nd floor, and when not dancing, they deliver food orders in the hotel pub....WTF? 4* respectable hotel with a strip bar.

    It's all a bit twilight zone.

    Sent from my BlackBerry 9780 using Tapatalk
     
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  2. Si.

    Si. God Like

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    Sounds like a top place to be fair mate!
     
  3. vino

    vino New Member

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    Yeah, I'm acclimatising

    Sent from my BlackBerry 9780 using Tapatalk
     
  4. Andrew

    Andrew Active Member

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    Sounds like a top draw hotel to me
     
  5. gixerthou

    gixerthou Active Member

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    imagine what your get if you order room service ?
     
  6. Andrew

    Andrew Active Member

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    And ask for extra's
     
  7. MrB

    MrB God Like

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    mmmmmmm :cool:
     
  8. gixerthou

    gixerthou Active Member

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    oh and you should have got a pic of the maid

    even with your crap blueberry
     
  9. Andrew

    Andrew Active Member

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    Yeah this thread is useless without pic's, get back down to the bar and order something else!!
     
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  10. Dave V

    Dave V Elite Member

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    2nd floor me up?
     
  11. MrB

    MrB God Like

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    Just don't eat from the bowl of nuts on the bar, especially so with a strip club up stairs
     
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  12. kpone

    kpone Moderator
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    V, I'm lapping this up. Can't wait for chapter two.

    But if you do a Si on us and pretend you're being kidnapped.....
     
  13. megawatt

    megawatt Well-Known Member

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    Yeah! FFS, PICTURES!!!!
     
  14. Benn The Pig

    Benn The Pig Well-Known Member

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    Think you should pm me the details so I can investigate in full!!!
     
  15. Jimbo Vills

    Jimbo Vills God Like

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    WTF!! we regularly cry our eyes out about corporate stop overs and I'm stuck in f*cking Oxford whilst your being served nuts by a bird dressed as a French maid....

    Our friendship is over!!
     
  16. Jimbo Vills

    Jimbo Vills God Like

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    Ps... I trust your going to the second floor to spend some serious cash and pretend the md of the distributor is still with you! ;)
     
  17. Givover

    Givover God Like

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    Thats a top tale please keep a diary there is bound to be more.
     
  18. vino

    vino New Member

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    Was too shocked to think about it.

    So today I presented at an event. Joined the delegates at the coffee break....and (at 11:30am) it's apparently perfectly normal for them to be necking shots of the local hooch.

    I like this town!
     
  19. Freedom of choice

    Freedom of choice Elite Member

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  20. Givover

    Givover God Like

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    Were did you say you are Wrexham??
     

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