Benedict XVI has announced that he has changed his mind and wishes to be the Pope until his death. When asked by reporters about his change of heart, he explained that he had not understood when he announced his retirement that he would have to have his ring smashed before he left office.
In the restaurant last night, i started rubbing my foot up the wife's leg "Mmmmmmmm" she said prevocutively "Footsie hey, we have'nt played that for years" Footsie my arse, I'd trod in some dog shit on the way in! Mornin!!!
The wife nudged me at 7-30 this morning "Move your arse" she said "you've got to take the kids to school" "But i did it yesterday" I replied rolling over "you do it this time?" "I'm not the f@@kin bus driver" she answered.........Mornin!!!
Gary Neville's father Neville Neville has been arrested on sexual charges .If he carries on like that he is going to get himself a bad name.
Evenin all..............Just got back from A+E after swallowing some Lego, the doc seems to think i'll be ok but i'm shitting bricks!!!
http://sphotos-g.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/426130_333602106718659_1397902270_n.jpg The Barnsley boys will get it.
Dave you are the ... not sure sure what but your it..... i have the train line to protect me fro thurnscoe east
A farmer in Yorkshire sees a man drinking from his stream, so he shouts , “Ey up cocker, tha dunt wanna be drinkin watta frum theer, its full o hoss piss an cow shite an it could kill thee” The man says: "Excuse me Sir, I am a muslim from Pakistan , can you be speaking clearer and slower please” The farmer replies: " if....you.... Use.... Two ....Hands....... You....Wont.... Spill ....Any"
