Thanks Santa for my Guy Martin canvass picture and.......a 5 night break to New York in May. With those 2 presents I wouldn't want anything else!
I think Santa has excelled himself this year....at trying my patience. He started his Christmas campaign against us on the 23rd by sending one of his reindeer suicide squad to try and take out L's SLK, ran straight out into the lane in front of her. The SLK won but not without battle scars, we haven't even looked at it properly in the light to review the damage, but it looked like the n/s headlight and bonnet have taken the brunt. We took my very old and cantankerous mother to the Belfry for Christmas eve, day, then leaving yesterday afternoon. Whilst I love her to death and know she doesn't mean to be the way she is. She has a way of pushing my buttons in a way my ex-wife, despite her best efforts, could never do. Forget buttons 1 to 9 she can hit number 10 without even breaking a sweat. The Belfry really let themselves down, the only warm place was our rooms. Christmas dinner was awful, the staff surly and rude, they didn't have our first choice of wine, or the second and suggested a third that was neither chilled nor drinkable, it was horrible. Towels replaced with someone else's dirty used towels, which they denied till I proved they were damp and had someone's skid marks on one of them. I kid you not.... and I am only mentioning the main problems or I would be here all night. I have used the Belfry many times for business and its always been brilliant so I have no idea what’s happened to the place, the only saving grace was they had Stella on draught so the pain was somewhat numbed. As I mentioned my mother had already pushed me to critical stress levels so, I was locked and loaded for war but L convinced me to let it go for now so the only comment I made when we left was that I had noticed that the security in the carpark had gone so I assume we now are free to leave. When we got home yesterday evening we discovered we had no power, no heating, sod all working and the house was freezing. After some deduction work by torch light I discovered our large freezer had packed up, taking out all the electric with some major short. Most of the food in there is scrap. Once disconnected we got power, light and heating back on. I said F4ck it I have had enough and opened two bottles from a case of 1998 Chateauneuf du Pape I had been saving for a rainy day…..guess what they were corked, as was the rest of the case. Now, those that know me know I seldom drink spirits………. L went to bed leaving me to my sorrows hugging a bottle of brandy. Today has not been a good day, it’s similar to having been out for an evening with Jimbo but with a more intense headache and feeling of internal organ failure. Maybe tomorrow I will be brave enough to have a look at the damage to L’s SLK. Roll on next Christmas when it’s my brother turn to look after my mother and we can sod off till New Year.
Bloody hell FoC. Are you sure you didn't have a secret love child years ago called Martin. You both seem to have the same amount of luck lately.
BBC News - The Belfry New Year stabbings reports 'malicious' And you think it was rough when you were there
